Lately, I have been forcing myself to confront the question of whether or not I actually trust God. It is not a question of trusting in Him for my salvation. I seem to be able to do that quite fine, and I know without a doubt that God has resolved the issue of my eternal life. But what has become clear more recently is that I do not seem to have the same faith in God for my here and now. I question His presence and promises in my current reality.
I have been believing that the promised “abundant life” of John 10:10 is somehow tied to a future reality, to a place that I have not yet reached. I have been feeling like that kind of abundance and that kind of fullness is still a few life decisions away—as if it was saved for a time when I have finally reached a place in my career where my contribution seems valid and meaningful, or for when I have finally met a man with whom I would like to partner with for life.
I unthinkingly believed that this kind of fullness was somehow attached to a certain path that I needed to choose and a certain place that I needed to reach. It made me anxious to think that I could somehow miss the chance and then end up missing this abundance because of some poor life decision that I would make. I found myself frequently leaning on God in prayer and in meditation to help me make wise decisions to get to that sweet spot of abundance.
“Redeeming the time” had become my mantra during this waiting period. Because I was not where I wanted to be, I believed that I was in a wilderness period for some spiritual lesson that I did not want to miss. I threw myself into this wilderness period with great visions of using the time and not missing some key lesson that God wanted me to learn before He would give me this fullness. I refused to give in to loneliness or despair but instead, I kept believing that this was just a dry period that I needed to endure faithfully—I just needed to get through it.
From a certain perspective, this is a worthy pursuit. There are tough periods in our lives which are designed to be endured joyfully for our own spiritual development and for God’s greater purpose.
In this particular case, however, I realize now that I am not actually in a wilderness or a dry period. I am just in my own life, and in my own current reality, but because it is not what I want it to be, I was assuming that it was a wilderness to be endured.
Here is what I am learning: the abundant life is here and now, in my own current reality.
We need to accept the life we are living today. We need to surrender to God’s wisdom and trust that, as Christians, the life we are already in is already inherently abundant. We need to understand that we have already received God’s peace, contentment, and joy. God does not require a future or a specific moment or a specific decision to make us whole. His presence makes us whole now. We are equipped perfectly; our lives have all the ingredients for fullness and abundance here and now.
That said, there is nothing wrong with waiting patiently, expectantly, and hopefully for God to continue to answer our prayers and transform our lives. In fact, to be a Christian is to wait on God and to believe in His promises to come. But as we wait, let’s not just endure. We are meant to experience abundant lives, and that abundance is not something to strive for in the future. Abundance is in the now, waiting for us to accept our present reality as full and purposed; to see our life circumstances as God sees them; and to experience in a new way all the fullness of God in our current day-to-day.
Let’s be open to seeing the fullness of God in our lives today and every day of our lives.
Question to consider: What are practical ways you can “be open to seeing the fullness of God in our lives today”?
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